Emersonian Conservatives

Mar 17, 2013

The Modern Conservative

"A foolish consistency is the hobgoblin of little minds, adored by little statesmen and philosophers and divines."
Ralph Waldo Emerson

After digesting CPAC's thinking this last week, I rise to congratulate Conservatism in overcoming its hobgoblins and being entirely inconsistent. I worry though that it may have transcended the “foolish” consistencies and started overthrowing the central tenets of their philosophy as they rose to self-reliance.

For example, they seem to believe that human nature, while poor, is greedy, self-serving and grasping. We have to protect ourselves from human nature as it makes welfare cheats and folks that would steal from the social safety net.

However, human nature instantly becomes trustworthy when it forms a company or starts to work at a multi-national bank, no longer needing government regulation.

They argue children are our future and every life is precious. Government has the obligation to ensure that birth control is neither taught nor readily available. Mothers, although the Supreme Court has ruled that abortions must be available, must be discouraged from choosing not to carry a fetus to term.


Poor mothers mustn't be allowed to see Planned Parenthood Doctors, because, although they are the only recourse to Gynecology many poor women have, it will counsel them to take care of their health;

Programs to feed the children's families are a waste of taxpayers' money; and

We are willing to consign them to an Earth that is polluted and toxic, because the science that tells us we have to take steps to slow climate change are based on science we don't want to listen to.

They would let us believe that the Supreme Court must defer to the will of Congress, unless it passes the Voting Rights Act, in which case, the Supreme Court must stop Congress from acting on the facts it found.

Government is overbearing and over-regulating, unless it's regulating pot smoking. It can establish no Religion, unless it's the obvious statement that God exists. That's not a “religion” that's just an “obvious conclusion.”

It's not alright to kill people with drones. It is okay to bomb the nuclear facilities of Iran with people inside them.

It's mandatory to have a free market, except for oil, that we must prop up with subsidies and tax breaks. However, applying those same benefits to the Auto Industry is bad, because Government shouldn't help private businesses.

Gay and Lesbian people shouldn't be allowed to marry because marriage has always been between one man and one woman. It says so in the Bible, which is the narrative that the self-evident “God” gave us full-blown to regulate ourselves. Well, except for Abraham, who had many wives. And some other folks back then too. Ignore King David, he's just in there to demonstrate the handiness of a slingshot. Pork's okay to eat now too. This is all covered by the Religion observation, anyways, so they're being consistent.

The time is past when each person could be considered his own little island. We're part of an interconnected chain. Government functions so that when our best nature can't be relied upon, there is help for us to rise to it again and when our worst nature threatens to overcome us, it is checked so that we don't hurt others. Let's hold to that principal as we herd our hobgoblins.